Mother's Day

I often wish I could talk to my mother for just five minutes. She's been gone for a few years now and for ten years before she died you couldn't really have a conversation with her. Dementia had taken it's hold by the time she was in her late 70's and she, of course, was never the same after the onset of this insidious malady. It's been a long time since I've been able to pick up the phone and ask her how she's doing. I think of her on mother's day and send her good fortune wherever she might be. Eligal was her nickname and that's what we all called her---except when she made us mad and then she was "Mama." She wasn't much of a cook, preferring the golf course, doing water colors or hiding out in the attic where she went to play the guitar. There was an article in yesterday's NY Times featuring paintings by several artists who depicted childhood memories of dishes prepared by their mothers. I laughed when I thought of how I'd paint a small plate of canned pears with some grated cheese on top or, if we were lucky, a sandwich of cream cheese and dates. Luckily, we had a wonderful maid who took up the slack. If it hadn't been for Elizabeth, I think we'd have starved....Not all women are meant to be good cooks and she had other memorable traits. Anyway, I had lunch with a friend at a local restaurant yesterday and watched several families celebrating motherhood. I pined for Eligal who used to make me laugh, who could infuriate me like nobody else could, who soothed my wounds at times and who was always interested in what I was up to no matter what she really thought about it all. I also saw a wonderful movie called "Mother and Child" with Annette Benning, written and directed by Rodrigo Garcia who did a couple of other films I liked, "Things You Can Tell Just by Looking at Her" and "Nine Lives." This film is sort of melancholy but very touching. I think that if I had my longed-for five minutes talk with my mother, I would have told her how much I enjoyed the movie. I doubt she'd ever have seen it but she would have feigned interest --- maybe that's what I miss.